I found myself running errands alone a few nights ago. Car after car linked together on the main thoroughfare with the rush of post-workday traffic. Without hurry, I decided to take the winding side roads that lead through the suburbs. The sun barely touched the western horizon, on its inevitable path to recede from my field of vision.
The neighborhood I drove through spanned a few miles of well-kept middle-class homes. Looking out my windows I saw tiny slivers of life that seem to hold very little depth when taken at face-value. It’s like reading the end of a novel before you read the beginning, and being unable to watch the steps it takes for the characters to end up at the finality that the reader is left with. A black lab sitting in his driveway, sullen until he can go back inside. Three young siblings on bikes circling closer to the road with every pass. A younger couple unloading groceries from their jeep into the house. A pair of older men drinking beer on the porch, in the midst of a clearly hilarious conversation. Neighbors doing yard work, exchanging periodic small talk over imaginary divides. Like a stained-glass window, each of these multihued shards come together as bits of the same lifestyle being told many times over; congregating together without any of the players actually realizing it.
Other people’s lives just give me glimpses, but I seek my place in this as well. The most common theme of my life so far has been waiting for domesticity. I long for the moments when girlfriend becomes wife, apartment becomes home, and self becomes family. I want to have a place to call our permanent home and raise kids. I want to have hasty breakfasts together before we realize we’re all late, and leave work early to go to piano recitals. I want to play fetch with the dog and mow the lawn for the hundredth time. I want to sit under a tree with my wife on summer nights to watch the fireflies, and plan elaborate treasure hunts for my kids to find their birthday presents. I want to stand in the front yard watching the storms roll in, and put up the Christmas tree together while the snow covers the ground under the moonlight.
Life’s funny isn’t it? Despite our best-laid plans, it still never seems to turn out how we want. Ever feel like you’re just trapped in circumstance? As time goes on, all these temporary lifestyle changes I’ve been making have become more permanent. This week marks the first time since high school that I’ve lived in one place for a whole year, and soon I’ll be leaving here too. Though I’m not sure exactly where or when, yet. And even then, it’ll just be another temporary place until I can afford a house. I have my own blind faith that those dreams will be fulfilled in the distant future, but at what point do I stop racing against the hands of the clock? At what point do I acknowledge that every time the sun goes down, it feels like it’s beaten me somehow? There’s something to be said about being assertive, but it doesn't seem like assertiveness would fix this. I still need to wait for circumstance to let me be free. I can’t get a house until I know where it needs to be, which I won’t know until I know what’s happening with work, versus dog-training and the stock market, and where Lia will end up working once she graduates. Until then, the days pass, and I guess I just have to be patient.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Dog-Training Frustration
At this point, I am about half-way through my dog-training curriculum, and the further I get, the more I’m starting to realize that I think most of the learning is going to be the hands-on stuff at the end.
I’ve gone up to work with PJ’s dog twice now. The first session was an amazing success. The most important thing to teach at the outset of training is the food lure exercise, where you train the dog to follow a treat that’s concealed in your hand. All the other training from this point requires the trainer to food-lure the dog into the various positions needed (sit, heel, etc.) Maverick picked it up pretty quickly and within probably 15-20 minutes I could get him to keep his nose against my hand while I walked around PJ’s house. I taught the exercise to PJ as well so that he could keep up the practice while I was gone.
The second session was quite a bit more disappointing. When I arrived at PJ’s, we sat and chatted for a while before I actually began the training. During this time, Mav was at the back door, making it clear that he had to go out. PJ obliged, and after a couple minutes went back to let him in again. But Mav was gone! The metal part of his chain that attaches to his collar had bent, which let his collar unhook and he had bolted out into the countryside. We tracked him down after looking for about a half-hour, but once we got him back inside, all three of us were exhausted.
My lesson was teaching him the Focus cue, where I get him in the heel position (at my left side) and looking up into my eyes, presumably waiting for my next command. Once I have another command to give, at least. The heel position was near impossible to get him in. I could get him to circle around me and face me, but not sit at my side facing forward while looking up. Even with the food lure, no real progress. After trying that for a while with little success, I attempted to just teach him Focus from sitting in front of me and facing me. The way I was instructing this is as follows: I would get a treat, show it to Mav, and hold it next to my face. I say “focus” and I wait for him to look at my eyes instead of gazing longingly at the treat. As soon as he makes eye-contact with me, I give him the treat and praise him. In theory, he will learn that he gets rewarded only when he looks at my eyes, instead of at the treat, and at that point he will start associating the word “focus” with paying attention to me. However, he was just not picking it up. Looking back now, (after finishing the chapter) there were a few things wrong with the technique I used.
First of all, showing Mav the treat first constitutes a bribe, instead of a reward. The difference being that if I show him the treat first, once he figures out what a cue means he will ONLY give the cue if he knows he’s being rewarded, instead of letting it become natural to him.
Second, both Mav and I were absolutely exhausted after his little romp so he probably just wanted to sleep. He continued to the rest of the day.
Third, when you’re teaching a dog a new command, you are NEVER supposed to repeat it. If the dog doesn’t comply and you repeat the command, it gradually shows the dog that the command has no meaning, since they got away with not having to do anything. Eventually, they will just tune you out because you’re not following through. There were a couple of times when I ended up repeating the command.
Fourth, timing has to be PERFECT. Dogs associate whatever’s happening at the EXACT TIME the reward or punishment is given with a behavior. If he makes eye-contact and I go to reward him, he’s usually focused his attention back on the treat by the time my hand goes to feed him. This is also why dogs who get physical corrections (like getting hit or pushed) by their owners never seem to learn that what they’re doing is incorrect. Aside from the fact that it’s just cruel, instead of associating the fact that they peed on the floor four hours ago with the punishment, they associate the punishment with the approach of a person. In essence, they learn that people are bad and are threats to their safety, which makes the dog fearful and/or aggressive, which can pose a danger to anyone in the home. See how that links together? Anyway, that’s way off topic.
My other main concern is that PJ’s so far away. About an hour/hour and a half drive, meaning that I don’t always have the time or ability to travel that far for training. Dog training is one of those things where consistency and daily lessons are required and I can usually only get up there once a week at most. My worry here is that Mav is going to forget some of his training unless I keep teaching PJ how to do it every practice session.
I’m heading up there again tomorrow, so I’m hoping that this lesson runs a bit smoother.
I’ve gone up to work with PJ’s dog twice now. The first session was an amazing success. The most important thing to teach at the outset of training is the food lure exercise, where you train the dog to follow a treat that’s concealed in your hand. All the other training from this point requires the trainer to food-lure the dog into the various positions needed (sit, heel, etc.) Maverick picked it up pretty quickly and within probably 15-20 minutes I could get him to keep his nose against my hand while I walked around PJ’s house. I taught the exercise to PJ as well so that he could keep up the practice while I was gone.
The second session was quite a bit more disappointing. When I arrived at PJ’s, we sat and chatted for a while before I actually began the training. During this time, Mav was at the back door, making it clear that he had to go out. PJ obliged, and after a couple minutes went back to let him in again. But Mav was gone! The metal part of his chain that attaches to his collar had bent, which let his collar unhook and he had bolted out into the countryside. We tracked him down after looking for about a half-hour, but once we got him back inside, all three of us were exhausted.
My lesson was teaching him the Focus cue, where I get him in the heel position (at my left side) and looking up into my eyes, presumably waiting for my next command. Once I have another command to give, at least. The heel position was near impossible to get him in. I could get him to circle around me and face me, but not sit at my side facing forward while looking up. Even with the food lure, no real progress. After trying that for a while with little success, I attempted to just teach him Focus from sitting in front of me and facing me. The way I was instructing this is as follows: I would get a treat, show it to Mav, and hold it next to my face. I say “focus” and I wait for him to look at my eyes instead of gazing longingly at the treat. As soon as he makes eye-contact with me, I give him the treat and praise him. In theory, he will learn that he gets rewarded only when he looks at my eyes, instead of at the treat, and at that point he will start associating the word “focus” with paying attention to me. However, he was just not picking it up. Looking back now, (after finishing the chapter) there were a few things wrong with the technique I used.
First of all, showing Mav the treat first constitutes a bribe, instead of a reward. The difference being that if I show him the treat first, once he figures out what a cue means he will ONLY give the cue if he knows he’s being rewarded, instead of letting it become natural to him.
Second, both Mav and I were absolutely exhausted after his little romp so he probably just wanted to sleep. He continued to the rest of the day.
Third, when you’re teaching a dog a new command, you are NEVER supposed to repeat it. If the dog doesn’t comply and you repeat the command, it gradually shows the dog that the command has no meaning, since they got away with not having to do anything. Eventually, they will just tune you out because you’re not following through. There were a couple of times when I ended up repeating the command.
Fourth, timing has to be PERFECT. Dogs associate whatever’s happening at the EXACT TIME the reward or punishment is given with a behavior. If he makes eye-contact and I go to reward him, he’s usually focused his attention back on the treat by the time my hand goes to feed him. This is also why dogs who get physical corrections (like getting hit or pushed) by their owners never seem to learn that what they’re doing is incorrect. Aside from the fact that it’s just cruel, instead of associating the fact that they peed on the floor four hours ago with the punishment, they associate the punishment with the approach of a person. In essence, they learn that people are bad and are threats to their safety, which makes the dog fearful and/or aggressive, which can pose a danger to anyone in the home. See how that links together? Anyway, that’s way off topic.
My other main concern is that PJ’s so far away. About an hour/hour and a half drive, meaning that I don’t always have the time or ability to travel that far for training. Dog training is one of those things where consistency and daily lessons are required and I can usually only get up there once a week at most. My worry here is that Mav is going to forget some of his training unless I keep teaching PJ how to do it every practice session.
I’m heading up there again tomorrow, so I’m hoping that this lesson runs a bit smoother.
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